Hi, I'm Angel. I'm dead , wanna hook up?

etc   talk   cali
"I have decided
to make a home
in my own body.
I no longer
rent hearts
for comfort."

-Michelle K., This is My Thousandth Post.  (via i8yurcookie)

"1. He was the first to hold my waist and tell me I was beautiful, he looked at me like I was the world, but I wasn’t, I was a game for him and he got bored after a few turns
2. He couldn’t handle my fire, he wanted me, but not the me who yelled and spoke her mind, he wanted the one who put her hands in her lap and kept her mouth shut, she was never real and neither was our love
3. He smiled and blushed when I said his name, he held me tight when I cried, he always called me back, and he smelled like strawberries, but for the life of me I couldn’t fall for him
4. He was the first I found that could keep up with me, we spoke in a language no one but us could understand, fast tongues and quick wit, but you can only fight fire with fire for so long before you get ashes, our dalliance burned to the ground and so did we
5. He was exciting and good hearted, he needed me, he cared for me, he told me everything would be okay even when I knew it wouldn’t be, his smile lit up rooms, he was the one that got away"

"When he says
He doesn’t love you anymore,
Roll your shoulders back
And look him in the eye
Even when it feels like your ribs
Are breaking inward, like spider legs.
When he digs up old aches
That he swore he forgave you for,
And ask him why he didn’t leave you sooner.
Ignore the way the words feel like sandpaper
Running all the way up your throat to your mouth.
When he blames you
For mistakes that wear his face,
Do not scream.
Do not cry.
Tell him that there are boys
Who would be proud to say they’d loved you.
Tell him that in two years
You won’t even remember his name
And don’t let him see the way you can taste your own lie.
When he leaves
Ignore the howling in your blood
And do not get up after him.
Not even to lock the door.
Do not, do not
Do not.
Smell his shirts when you box them up
To give them back.
Not one.
Swear off dating when you realize
You’re chasing ghosts that wear his smile.
It’s okay to cry over him.
It’s even okay to forgive him.
But do not go back to him.
If he did not know how to love you the first time,
He won’t know how to do it the next."

"1. don’t listen to his drunk voicemails. the voice on the other side of the phone isn’t his, it’s Jack Daniels mixed with coke and the broken promises he’s trying to mend are as stale as the bourbon. alcohol is almost as poisonous as your love for him. hang up.
2. when your mom and step dad fight don’t stay, put your ear to the wall, and listen in they aren’t in love anymore and maybe never were. your presence won’t heal wounds dug so deep within their 10 year marriage, so just leave.
3. boys come and go. the right one will leave so many butterflies in your stomach you won’t be able to swim without the fear of drowning, and the wrong one will whisper he “loves you” while biting at your neck like the teeth of a bra. learn to notice the difference. your heart can only break so many times before it shatters.
4. love yourself when others can’t. i know it’s hard to wake up in the morning and look in the mirror but baby get dressed it gets better, the world was made for you and you are one of the most beautiful things put here.
5. being alone is going to be one of the hardest things you will ever experience. you will get in the shower some nights and never want to come out. you don’t need arms to hold you, or kisses to keep you feeling like you’re wanted. remember your mom loves you and so do I."



trying to talk to someone you really admire



(Source: wweesnaww)

683,306 notes   -  10 July, 2014

1. You will feel so alone you think you hear your bones screaming. The sky will look mint and the air will taste of mercury and purple salt. Here, you open the window and allow the cold to gnaw at your skin with it’s metal teeth. Allow it to ripple across your wrists like volcanic lava. Allow it to kiss your neck and tower over your eyelashes. Do not cry.

2. Make your walls bare. Take in the peeling paint. Take in the vast emptiness. Rip out every single page of your favorite novel and tape it to your walls. Breathe in the words. Exhale the characters, the plot, the black setting. Do not cry.

3. Fill the bathtub with water. Take a bath in the dark. Think about how the universe is expanding. You are made up of stardust. You have galaxies breathing inside your palms, the moon is swimming against your thighs. You are meteor showers and the Seven Sisters. Do not cry.

4. Wash your sheets with ivory detergent. Wash your hands with pomegranate soap. Put cucumbers on your eyes. Put lotion on your toes, elbows, collar bones. Do not cry.

5. Remember cities will burn and stomach acid will flood your liver and lungs. Remember people are making love, buying groceries, making omelets, committing murder, giving birth, taking exams, waiting for him, for her. Remember people are dying. You are not. Remember do not cry.

6. If there are needles stinging your chest and marmalade reminds you of red stained lips and hurricane eyes, write poetry. It is the only thing you can do. Paint yourself using the color of the sea. Do not limit yourself to blue. The ocean is not blue. It is brown and purple at sunrise. Green and opaque at dawn. Do not cry.

7. You are alone. There are gaps within us that can be filled with rubber cement. But we will always bleed. It is human nature. Let yourself bleed. The poison, the cockroaches, the mud, the oil. You are the only God you need. You are the only God you will ever need. And finally, baby, cry.


reblog if u single but too cute to be single

(Source: stoleyogirl)

35,802 notes   -  10 July, 2014



24,744 notes   -  10 July, 2014
"In one way or another I’ve always suffered. I didn’t know why exactly. But I do know that I’m not so scared of suffering now. I feel more than I’ve ever felt, and I’ve found someone to feel with. To play with. To love in a way that feels right for me. I hope he knows that I can see that he suffers too. And that I want to love him."